I had the opportunity to sit down with a gentlemen friend of mine and he conducted an interview with me about my life and this profession. What follows below is his article from that interview…
Riley is in her early 30’s and is dressed in business casual attire that would be appropriate in the boardroom or out on the town for a few cocktails. Even in attire that suits the moment and the environment, she garners glances from many of the patrons in the lounge. She is noticeable in a crowd for all of the right reasons.
She is casual and relaxed as we discuss her job and her feelings about the profession. With a Grey Goose on the rocks in hand, Riley settles back to chat about her life in this somewhat unique field of work.
“I do this job because I absolutely love it. There is a huge misconception about what this profession is actually like. Most of what I do isn’t sex at all.”
What made you decide to pursue a career in this profession?
I have actually always been curious about this business. I like to think that I got started because I was looking for something out of ordinary that I could do part time as a supplement to my regular career. I wanted a change and to perhaps meet new people. I really wanted to find a completely new environment from the one in which I was working. I'm the kind of person that embraces change as I believe it helps keep us interested and motivated.
I stumbled upon an ad in my local newspaper seeking employees for a local massage parlour. This was certainly not the type of job that I was looking for, but it definitely offered a change and a new environment, so I made the call and arranged an interview.
The rest as they say is history and that's why, where and who I am today.
Do you recall your first experience in this profession and can you tell us about it?
I remember it as if it were yesterday....
I had applied for a job in a local massage parlour. They were advertising for a receptionist, but when I appeared at the interview I was asked if I wanted to work as a masseuse.
It was not at all like what you might see in the movies, I was not some young, naïve girl who was tricked by a slick and shady operator. I accepted the position having an idea of the type of work that I was being hired to do, but I was still a bit unsure and had more questions than answers.
My very first client was an older gentleman. I was told by the other staff that he was a regular visitor to the local parlors and that he always liked to see the pretty new girls whenever possible.
I was very nervous. I remember him being so calm and interested in my story and what had brought me here. His interest and attentiveness made me feel as if I was spending time with an old friend that I had known for years. Our conversation flowed effortlessly although I did most of the talking.
He kindly gave me a few tips about the profession that I've carried with me since and relied upon in many situations. I am so happy to have had this kind of introduction to the profession and to my first experience. I felt completely at ease and natural.
We were both so engrossed in our conversation that we didn’t notice the time flying past. Before we realized it, my timer was counting down to the end of our appointment and we hadn’t even begun the massage! We had just enough time left for me to provide the gentleman with a happy ending and then we bid each other farewell.
I am not sure how my time in this profession would have progressed had I not had such a pleasant and rewarding first experience.
Do you still get nervous before you see clients?
For sure I do, but it’s a good kind of nervous. It’s more excitement and anticipation really.
Communicating with a client prior to our meeting helps to build the anticipation. There is always something new and fresh about each booking, even if it is with a regular client.
I compare the anticipation of a client meeting to that of a blind date. I still get some wonderful little butterflies in my tummy just as I am about to open the door.
Who are the clients usually?
My average client is probably in his 40’s and the majority are married. They are usually professionals, business owners or managers. They come from very diverse backgrounds, countries, careers and religions.
Many men tell me how they have lost the spark in their marriage or relationship and want to find a way to enjoy the things that are missing at home.
It may be surprising to some, but most of what my clients seek is not the sex….it is far more about companionship, someone to talk with who will listen to them in a non-judgemental way.
I spend most of my time with a client sitting on a couch and just listening. I make them feel comfortable and am always attentive to what they have to say.
It sounds like you do a lot more talking than most people would assume.
Absolutely….much more talking AND listening! Many of my clients just want to be able to unload on an emotional level. In their daily life, they are worried about women judging them and that makes them keep their guard up. They feel compelled to fill the stereotypical male role and always appear strong and in control.
Each time that a man feels as though he is being judged for anything that is less that perfection, he gets a little bit more defensive. It is not healthy to bottle all that up inside. You need an outlet, and for a number of men I am the outlet that they need.
Some people argue that this profession serves to objectify women. How do you feel about that?
I couldn’t disagree more. I can only speak for myself but there are as many reasons to pursue this profession as there are individuals working in it. Admittedly, some who work in this profession do so against their will and I have the utmost compassion and sympathy for their plight. For me however, I perform this job as a choice, made of my own free will.
People often view this profession as if the women in it are just selling their bodies for money. In reality we are embracing our own bodies and our right to do with it what we want. That is very empowering.
I believe that the most vocal opponents of this profession and those who argue that it objectifies women, are the ones who actually know little or nothing about the lives of those who have chosen to work in this field.
I most definitely do not have any regrets about the choices I have made that have brought me to where I am today. Along the way I have had the pleasure of meeting several wonderful gentlemen, and each one of them has a unique story of their own. It is these stories and the different personalities with which I am able to interact that make this profession so interesting.
I have always seen my role in an encounter with a client as that of a good listener as opposed to that of a sex object. Listening to clients in a non-judgemental manner is perhaps the most important skill that I use on a daily basis. Many clients comment that our time together has been like a therapy session.
To my clients I am not an object, but rather a confidant and a friend. The extreme personal nature of our interactions and conversations completely eradicate any sense of objectification.
What is the biggest misconception about the life of a companion, and how does the reality differ from what is portrayed in movies?
People tend to think that someone in the profession will have sex with ANYONE and that is simply not so. Thanks to the many review boards and a fairly tight and supportive community of service providers, we are able to screen potential clients quite thoroughly. Most girls will not provide service to someone who has a “sketchy” reputation or who is disrespectful or rude.
Movies seem to portray our profession as either very glamorous and exotic (Pretty Woman) or as very dark and dingy. Neither is accurate….at least not for me. I fall somewhere in the middle…maybe slightly closer to Pretty Woman than to the dark dingy tales. My job makes me very happy and I love doing this work.
I haven’t met Richard Gere yet, but hope to someday. (laughs)
Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?
Right here! I absolutely love the profession and I feel like my time has just begun.
When I first started in this business I thought that I might “stick my toes in the water” for a couple years and then move on. I had no idea that I would enjoy it this much!
Developing a good platform and being selective in my clientele has had a huge impact on my business.
Meeting wonderful gentlemen and having a great client base is what keeps me motivated. I am always humbled by the kindness and generosity shown to me by those lovely gentlemen that I have met. I am grateful for my success in this profession and look forward to what the future has to hold.
Do your friends or family know about what you do?
I have one friend in whom I confided about my profession, but I have regrets about doing so. We don’t talk about it very much, although at one point she sought my advice as she was considering getting into the profession. I just have a little nagging doubt in the back of mind whether I should trust anybodywith this information.
Besides the need for professional discretion and secrecy (for me AND my clients), the need for secrecy in my personal life is even greater.
I have met a number of other ladies who work in this profession, but I avoid forming friendships with them. I am a very private person and discretion is of the utmost importance to me. The fewer people that know about this part of my life, the more secure and confident I feel.
Have you ever thought about writing a book about your experiences and the industry?
Good question. I am actually in the process of writing a book, but with my busy personal life I feel like I am a little behind at the moment. I definitely have a great deal to write about and I look forward to being able to share some of my stories. As with everything I do, discretion will be paramount, and all details of events and clients will be carefully screened to prevent secrecy.
Would you like to be my next chapter? ( Laughs )
Every night before bed I make sure I write something about the industry or an experience that I would like to share. My ultimate goal is to have the book published and hopefully it will reach some people who are not presently interested/involved in the profession. I want to expand my audience beyond those who will read this interview on my website. I hope that I may be able to alter the stigma about our profession by sharing some of my feelings and experiences.